I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
He wanted to watch a Charlie Brown thanksgiving. But I was like, fuck that, I'm a grown up. So we watched jumanji and I sucked his dick.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
