Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
I would say I'm the man in the relationship but I'm cuddled on the couch eating cake mix and water.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
