mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
and you said cock pushups were impossible
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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