This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
