Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Wearing Navy dress whites to a wedding is like having a magical panty removing device. I've never cockblocked a whole room just by existing before.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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