better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
Randomize
