I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
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