evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I ran into the bouncer who kicked me out of that beach bar a few months ago. I told him I'd only been thrown out of two other places since then. He was proud.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
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