i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
