Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
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