How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Randomize
