I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
You have to summon your inner elephant
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
