i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
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