i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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