can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
Let's paint friendship bongs
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
Randomize
