i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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