so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
Farmville is her only friend.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
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