Approach what situation? Look, I dunno if you think I'm like some lezbo cheetah waitin in some shrubs to pounce on you the second I see you, but I'm not!
well, everyone in my office is getting a nice laugh right now. But seriously... please delete my number
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
I am literally sitting on the toilet in utter disbelieve that last night even happened. My god that was only Monday.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
the liver wants what the liver wants
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
