I wish I could punch you in the face.
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
Moving to Utah. Got sick of alcohol and have a severe wife shortage.
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Randomize
