dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I was short on money so I let my roommate mase me for $60
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
Future roommate keeps sending me pictures of cool shit she has for our dorm and I'm just like "... I have a set of Aggie wine glasses a great set of tits."
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
