brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
The smartest thing I've heard Obama do is call Kayne West a jackass
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
i'm high and self actualising, please send help
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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