watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I think I'm getting sponsored by the Mexican Drug Cartel for the start of my poker career. It was an interesting night at the bar. One word, Vegas.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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