Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
I don't have any plans for New Year's except watching anime and drinking until I can't read the subtitles anymore.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
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