if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
I misunderstood what a furry was. Come pick me up.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
There still is not and there never will be anything as magical as getting high while listening to William Shatner's version of Bohemian Rhapsody.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize
