Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Blackout me just wants to pee on sober me's dreams. Literally.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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