he's super hid and wouldn't leave us alone so i snatched his phone and started texting lovelink (thanks for a well-timed commercial) that will cost him money. muhahaha
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Randomize