I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
