Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
Randomize
