My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
I hope I bought a crossbow. Also I need to not drink that much
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
You're a waste of cheezeits
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
i'm not drunk or reckless enough to have you track my every fucking move. I AM AN ADULT
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
Randomize
