You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
