I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
I was so high last night. I wrote a poem about my salt shaker
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
Yes someone did see you carrying a beer bong on the side of coastal highway
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
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