if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
Just you wait I'll be crying and puking everywhere in no time
I been sleeping but occasionally wake up feeling like tiny elves are in my throat ripping my esophagus to shreds with their bare hands.
Somehow, you made that sound extremely magical and not at all painful.
If he comes over tomorrow, im answering the door naked. Simple as that.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
Randomize