who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
In your drunken brilliance did you make bagel with what appears to be mac and cheese smeared on top and pink icing dip? Because if so it is sitting on the counter
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
I have feelings that need drinking.
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Randomize
