also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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