Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
I can't wait for you to see these terrible photos I'm about to have taken with some stripper looking girls. I don't know what this photographer is thinking
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
He pulled a kid having a seizure out of a car and stayed with him until the ambulance came.
he what???
Not kidding. My ovaries cannot handle this shit...swear next time he'll rescue a bunch of pound puppies and hand them out to lonely orphans.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
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