no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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