You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
