we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
