You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
