it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
As a side note, can you ask the maintenance staff not to drag their balls on our stairwell handrails. Please.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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