Whoa Z and x make the same sound
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
A man just sang Jennifer Lopez to me out his car window. I am not sure how I feel about this, but it is not positively.
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Damn victory sex feels great
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
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