When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I literally recorded a toilet flushing to make it his ringtone to remind me what a piece of shit he is
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
