I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
I just want you to know that I am dancing around my apartment by myself singing Taylor Swift into a wine bottle. Do hurry.
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
Randomize
