he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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