watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I woke up with someone else's vomit on my ass. That's how I'm doing today.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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