the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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