Having your wife answer your cell was so lame. Maybe we can talk when you get your phone, your facebook account, and your balls back.
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
So, I just pissed in her shampoo bottle. Hope she enjoys a late golden shower from me.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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