I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
He told me he wants to eat me out all day while I lay in bed watching football. Seems like a solid foundation for a relationship to me.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize
