I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
You're about to makeout with my vagina, I don't think she cares that you haven't brushed your teeth. Just get over here!
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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