Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
